I began my fourth year here in a bit of a rut –– I was unemployed and creatively stagnant and generally feeling fairly shitty about myself, both in spite of and because of the Sundance experience earlier in the year. Then, two days later (a year ago today), I went on my first date with a woman I knew at the time as Fran, but who has since become Franny. My Franny. We spent our first date walking all over Manhattan, shared our first kiss on a bench by a waterless fountain in Madison Square Park, and I knew. And then everything else seemed to fall into place –– my struggle now is so much less of a struggle than it was then, although the perspective required to appreciate this is still slippery. Oh my.
I just finished another short film, and it’s screening tomorrow (Sunday) at the Tribeca Cinemas in Manhattan. The film is called I Heart Staten Island, and I’m proud of it, and I’m pretty sure I like it. I figured out how to make a blood spraying out of neck effect using supplies purchased at a Home Depot, so you should expect to see this effect in all my films from now on. I’m not going to make zombie films, and if I did make a zombie film, it would have absolutely no blood spraying out of neck effects, just to throw people off.
But I digress.
Franny is coming to the screening with me tonight, and that’s pretty cool.
I was introduced to the work of Adam Curtis by my friends Becky and David in Denver last fall, and he has since become one of my favorite filmmakers. His documentaries are both entertaining and mind-blowing, and his world view is one that I can’t help but subscribe to.
The above is the first part of his most well-known film. You should watch it.
I’m directing/producing a five minute short film this week and next, we shot the first of two days today. It was a very easy shooting day, as we were just shooting outdoor stuff with no sound, which was kind-of ideal considering this is the first film I’ve directed since After You Left, the remarkable success and subsequent drama of which have made me a bit hesitant to jump back into the directing ring. I’m hoping this this small film will help me get my mojo back.
Anyway, here’s a still from earlier today that has very little to do with what the film is actually about…
Life’s been a bit of a blur lately, or maybe a bit more than lately. I’ve been working a lot – lately I’ve been editing at the corporate job most days and either editing/writing or trying to edit/write at night. It’s good, I tell myself, and sometimes I believe it. Other times I feel like I should be more social, or something, and that the fact that I almost never feel not busy isn’t necessarily a good thing.
On Friday night Franny and I went to the Radiohead concert in beautiful Newark, and after all was said and done, it was a bit of an exhausting let-down that ended with us getting caught in a downpour just as we were trying to find a taxi home from Penn Station. I really like Radiohead, and I think that it was a good Radiohead concert, but sometime during the second half of the show their once very cultural zeitgeist-y feeling music started to feel a bit stale to me. Perhaps I’m getting older, perhaps the cultural zeitgeist has moved on, or perhaps the band that so known for breaking new musical ground has finally started to run out of ground… probably a bit of all three.
It also probably had a lot to do with the fact that it was held in an arena, which is my least favorite place to see a concert, and to see Radiohead in an arena full of twenty-thousand relatively wealthy white people felt ironic in a way that I can’t quite put put my finger on. Not good ironic.
They did have a kick-ass stage setup, though, and I hope to get one of the video panels for Christmas.
There will be little rubs and disappointments everywhere, and we are all apt to expect too much; but then, if one scheme of happiness fails, human nature turns to another; if the first calculation is wrong, we make a second better: we find comfort somewhere.